What is Valentine's Day!?
Writing this, I do understand that it does come off as someone who is bitter and is trying to find a way out of participating in Valentine’s Day. But, I promise you, that is not the case, or I hope it isn’t.
My feed has been full of memes, reels, products and services being marketed for Valentine’s Day. (Seems like everyone is selling something for Valentine’s, wondering who is going to buy.)
One particular reel is of a guy singing the names of gents who don’t buy their ladies gifts on Valentine’s Day. “Tadiwa haatenge, Takudzwa haatenge…” Didn’t finish the whole reel but if my name isn’t mentioned, I am thoroughly disappointed.
Add to that the memes that have been posted since December of “pane vachasara vasina chavakabata on the 14th of February.”
My problem with Valentine’s Day
My problem with it is now in its mass commercialisation. And the sort of external pressure from media to now participate in it. It’s like if you don’t participate in Valentine’s Day, you are not a good partner (maybe you aren’t, what do I know?)
How do I then know that I actually did whatever I did for my partner because I wanted to and not because I was pressured to do so, just so that she is not subject to the ridicule of her friends?
The concept is not lost on me
There should be a day where we celebrate love. I am all for that. Every day of the year is a day to celebrate something. But let’s compare mother’s day to Valentine’s Day.
Mother’s Day vs. Valentine’s Day
| Feature | Mother’s Day 👩👧👦 | Valentine’s Day 💘 |
|---|---|---|
| Who is celebrated? | Moms (can touch hot pots and not get burnt) | Couples (or “couples”) |
| Gift expectations | Breakfast in bed, heartfelt cards, spa day | Flowers, chocolates, mukomana webhosvo (kana gitare), a Range Rover Evoque, and possibly the moon |
| Social pressure level | Moderate to nil – Forgetting is unwise but forgivable | Forgetting is equivalent to forgetting the relationship ever existed |
| Reaction to a forgotten day | “It’s okay, sweetheart…” | “Oh, so you just don’t love me? That’s fine. Totally fine. (It’s NOT fine.)” |
| Who benefits the most? | Moms get a day of appreciation (maybe) | Denilson Musekiwa |
| Social media effect | Cute baby photos, emotional tributes, #BestMomEver posts | Endless couple selfies making singles question their life choices (i.e. thinks of calling the ex) |
| How singles handle it? | Not applicable (everyone has a mom) | “Self-love is important!” (while binge-watching Netflix and eating a sack of potatoes cooked in 30 distinct ways) |
| How late you can plan it? | A day before, and she’ll still love you | If you book dinner late, enjoy your romantic evening at Chicken Slice |
Conclusion
In summary, don’t get me wrong. It’s good. Vanhu dananai.
But I don’t buy into the pressure that the commercialisation of Valentine’s day has brought. In fact I oppose it vehemently.
PS: I will still participate in the pressure because I don’t want to get dumped (so please take what I am saying with a big grain of salt)
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